Super Happy Random Bonus Blog
Hey there 'Redheads... Since I'm bored at home on a Thursday night and July has so far been a desolate wasteland with a scant two installments, I figured why not make this week a two-fer. Lucky you. This installment is going to be more of a hodgepodge than usual, so strap in and let's get this tangential train a rollin'...
I'm glad August is almost here, because that means we're just weeks away from the NFL. I just signed up for my first of three fantasy football leagues, which has me more excited than any of the sports going on in reality at the moment. I am in sports hell right now...baseball, golf, tennis, soccer, and the WNBA. I flipped past a WNBA game earlier this evening. There was 5 minutes left in the third quarter and neither team had broken 50. In fact, the losing team only had 24. I'm no whiz at math, but 24 divided by 3 is 8. 8 points per quarter in a game where some shots are worth 3. I've seen fewer bricks at a construction site. I'm sure there's a World of Warcraft basketball league that scores more off the court than these gals do on the court. Did I mention this blog might stink? Let's move on...
Of course, the nation is mourning the loss of yet another television icon. Gidget, the Taco Bell chihuahua died of a stroke at the ripe old age of 15, which would make her 105 in dog years. I think she had a good run. She helped pave the way for other talking pitch animals, like that plucky Geico gecko. I'm not one to start wild rumors, but did anyone else find it kinda suspicious that Gidget kicked just days after Michael Vick got out? Just sayin' is all... Gidget, just know that the chalupa that was dropped on the floor at every Taco Bell in the nation was for you. I just hope she gets her due and gets a spot on the In Memoriam segment of the Emmys. Put her right between Bea Arthur and Walter Cronkite. Speaking of the venerable Mr. Cronkite, seeing TMZ.com report Walter Cronkite's death was like watching Dane Cook mug his way through a George Carlin routine on YouTube. Yech with a side of blech.
With the headline-grabbing deaths of Gidget and Walter Cronkite, I'm sure most of you missed the passing of another great man...
John S. Barry, an executive who masterminded the spread of WD-40, the petroleum-based lubricant and protectant created for the space program, into millions of American households, died on July 3 in the La Jolla neighborhood of San Diego. He was 84.
One thing is certain. When he is laid to rest, his casket won't have squeaky hinges.
And now, these messages...
...and we're back.
I was driving around DC the other day, and I found the American University of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. It was located at the end of a small tunnel.
Before I go, I want to get in one last plug for a kick ass show this Sunday at Union Jack's in Bethesda. Will Hessler, Bey Wesley, Jimmy Meritt, Rob Maher, and yours truly as your host, spread the joy starting at 7:30. You spread the word starting now. This show is FREE. Click here for all the deets.
See you there...
I'm glad August is almost here, because that means we're just weeks away from the NFL. I just signed up for my first of three fantasy football leagues, which has me more excited than any of the sports going on in reality at the moment. I am in sports hell right now...baseball, golf, tennis, soccer, and the WNBA. I flipped past a WNBA game earlier this evening. There was 5 minutes left in the third quarter and neither team had broken 50. In fact, the losing team only had 24. I'm no whiz at math, but 24 divided by 3 is 8. 8 points per quarter in a game where some shots are worth 3. I've seen fewer bricks at a construction site. I'm sure there's a World of Warcraft basketball league that scores more off the court than these gals do on the court. Did I mention this blog might stink? Let's move on...
Of course, the nation is mourning the loss of yet another television icon. Gidget, the Taco Bell chihuahua died of a stroke at the ripe old age of 15, which would make her 105 in dog years. I think she had a good run. She helped pave the way for other talking pitch animals, like that plucky Geico gecko. I'm not one to start wild rumors, but did anyone else find it kinda suspicious that Gidget kicked just days after Michael Vick got out? Just sayin' is all... Gidget, just know that the chalupa that was dropped on the floor at every Taco Bell in the nation was for you. I just hope she gets her due and gets a spot on the In Memoriam segment of the Emmys. Put her right between Bea Arthur and Walter Cronkite. Speaking of the venerable Mr. Cronkite, seeing TMZ.com report Walter Cronkite's death was like watching Dane Cook mug his way through a George Carlin routine on YouTube. Yech with a side of blech.
With the headline-grabbing deaths of Gidget and Walter Cronkite, I'm sure most of you missed the passing of another great man...
John S. Barry, an executive who masterminded the spread of WD-40, the petroleum-based lubricant and protectant created for the space program, into millions of American households, died on July 3 in the La Jolla neighborhood of San Diego. He was 84.
One thing is certain. When he is laid to rest, his casket won't have squeaky hinges.
And now, these messages...
...and we're back.
I was driving around DC the other day, and I found the American University of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. It was located at the end of a small tunnel.
Before I go, I want to get in one last plug for a kick ass show this Sunday at Union Jack's in Bethesda. Will Hessler, Bey Wesley, Jimmy Meritt, Rob Maher, and yours truly as your host, spread the joy starting at 7:30. You spread the word starting now. This show is FREE. Click here for all the deets.
See you there...
Labels: comedy, energy, funny, Gidget, Jared Stern, Taco Bell, Walter Cronkite
posted by Jared at 9:25 PM
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